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The Grown-Ups Guide To Avoid Cheating

by Michelle Smith on October 27th, 2008

Adulthood is a tricky business. Lots to worry about……….Do you worry about cheating? 

An article was recently brought to my attention that suggests that cheating is not as prevalent and widespread as originally thought.  10 Things You Should Know About Cheating shares that:

Cheating is not as common as you might think. 1 in 5 men have strayed at least once during their married lives, and that figure drops to half in women. 

I thought, hurray - that’s not that bad!  It’s one of those things that we worry about unnecessarily? Cross it off the worry list - it’s not a problem!  Then, I started looking into it further for this post. Unfortunately, those numbers did not hold up. 

Most statistics sit at around 45-50% and they aren’t backed up by any named study. Usually they are quoted as “recent studies.”  In your life, how many of your friends have had cheating affect their lives?  Maybe we should figure out a way to rank these statistics ourselves?   Should we grab the number that seems most workable, most comfortable, most believable?

If that’s the case, then I’m going with this one from The Art of Manliness, because they then list ways to avoid cheating and I’m a fan of both good advice and insightful lists:

25% of all American men (and some studies put the number even higher) will have extramarital affairs during their lifetime.

And how to avoid cheating?  Well here are examples of the Art of Manliness’s good ideas that work equally well for committed men or women:

*Make your relationship your #1 priority

*Date your partner (or don’t stop with the wooing of your wife/husband or girlfriend/boyfriend, I’d say)

*Give up the porn

*Be romantic

*Talk to and with your partner

*Have a sense of honor and duty  (I love that one - we should all live our life that way)

*Establish boundaries with the opposite sex

*Evaluate your weak spots

*Avoid temptation

*Think it through - what are the possible consequences? Are they worth it? (No!!)

Being a responsible grown-up takes some work, sure, but are you ever going to regret being a good person?  Are you ever going to say, damn, I sure wish I’d cheated more, screwed over more people?  At some point in your life, you are going to have to decide what kind of person you are, what you can and cannot live with.  You are going to have to be a grown-up.

Any good anti-cheating advice you’d like to share? Any cautionary tales of cheating partners you believe might help other readers to avoid heartache?

Image credit: Michelle Smith

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