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The Art and Science of Hand-holding

by Sasha Manuel on October 13th, 2006

How do we categorise hand-holding? Have you ever wondered why such an act can trigger all sorts of emotions within you? What message do you relay when you hold another person’s hand?

Wikipedia lists the reasons and purposes when two or more people engage in the act of hand-holding and I’d like to cite some of them:

• Rituals
• Expression of friendship or love
• Enjoyment of physical contact
• Emotional support
• Physical guidance
• Dancing
• Arm wrestling

With that said, I’d like to focus on it being an act of expression of friendship and love.

In a relationship, the onset of physical intimacy will start with holding hands then perhaps move onto hugging then kissing, etc. However, I reckon it’s hand holding that remains the simplest and most evocative form of touch — which is of non-sexual or erotic nature — that two people can do to show their affection for the other.

Incidently, I’ve also heard said that the manner on how you hold the other person’s hand, i.e. right over left or left over right, intertwined fingers, held loosely or tightly, etc., says a lot about your personality or the kind of relationship that the two of you have.

Few of the things that also come to mind, when the act of hand-holding occurs, are how it signifies the comfort, concern, support, and unsaid affection that either or both parties have for the other or for each other, respectively.

This brings me to think that one should not take this act lightly. It can be a way for you to win him or her over or get your message across properly. Here are some tips on how to go about this business:

• With moderate eye contact,
• a kiss on the hand is romantic only when you have permission to do it,
• Never grope,
• Keep it light and un-intrusive,
• Caress with care,
• Learn when to let go,
• Sweaty palms is a no-go, keep your hands clean,
• And, please, don’t dare suck her/his finger! [I beg you!]

For me, I do believe that one of the sweetest things I know that two people can do is to hold hands. And when I say, hold hands, I mean it as an expression of love or friendship, regardless of how it is done. Holding the other person’s hand can actually say a thousand words that only the heart can translate. But that’s just my romantic-self, speaking.

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