Loving: Holding On and Letting Go
There are people who believe that holding on is the best way to show their love for the other person. And there are people who believe that letting go is. Does either qualify for any medals at all? I think not. Both are unequivocally right since it will entirely depend on what’s best for these people.
I believe that the underlying principle is sacrifice. Our willingness to subject ourselves to it. Will we have the courage to face the hurt? Will we be able to humble ourselves? Can we actually do something that’s self-less?
Personally, I believe that we are built to have relationships and I’m not talking about filial or fraternal. We seek to love and be loved. However, we don’t always end up having exclusive relationships with people we date but if or when we do, love enters into the equation. Then the relationship will go into lots of trials. We are after all complex beings that the ‘relating’ part will need constant and consistent attention and work. There are also issues of unrequited love and falling out.
The decision to choose between holding on and letting go can only be reached if and when that person has weighed consequences and benefits. Simple problem solving skill that most, if not all, apply in every decision. The choice may be difficult but ultimately, the primal need to survive is stronger (well, at least, it should be). Choosing to let go may mean you’re giving up but it can also be viewed as loving the person enough to allow him or her to find a healthier relationship. Choosing to hold on may mean you’re just to stubbornly blind to see that it’s damaging, simply catering to your own selfish weakness of dependence or it may mean that you’re willing to work things out until you find common ground. Choosing to let go doesn’t make holding on a better way to show your love and vice versa.
How will you know which one it is? Answer the questions I asked earlier in this post and you’ll get a better idea. But remember, this is a relationship which involves two people, ergo, both of you must have similar answers. A relationship isn’t a one way street.
Tags: Breaking Up, Dating, exclusive-relationship, holding-on, letting-go, love, reconciliation, relationship, sacrificeRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Advice, Breaking Up, For Couples
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